ouT oF MY aRMoR!

been a while. ya its been a while. i really have no time to blog. sorry. got chores to do. things to sort out.
i've never blogged in 3 weeks. well, it seems a lifetime. lots of things happening. it was a rush actually. students coming in, throat drying up. courses attended in hational university hospital and the tour to their bloodbank. nice people there. always smiling. i wonder though if they have powerpuff gals and mojo jojo to keep them on their toes. then comes center for transfusion medicine case studies. tsk tsk tsk, we let our boss down for being late! but it went smoothly. the reason why i donated blood is maybe to calm my nerves before my presentation. i think it helped though coz my hands didnt grow cold and i didnt freeze in front of mickey mouse.
well, not only im working night again but the real reason behind this days episode is im confused. i don't understand colleagues who i seem to call "friends" and i do understand them and now i wonder if they do understand me? or is this just a one way traffic type of a road were traveling. yep, an awfully big news struck the bank, and yep, mother hen is a very big loss to the lab. i feel you guys. trust me i do. i never get to know mother hen and i never get to be as close to her as i wish i could be. ive never had a superior like a friend in and out of work. i could talk to her about difficulties and ambition and feel like im talking to a "little" big sis.
what is good in goodbye? this came from a lyric of a song i know since secondary school. up until now i don't find any good. yet i am learning to cope with it. ive learned how not to be affected as much i have been before and try to understand why people come and go. what is shitty now is that some of them think that im in a 'suicidal' mood because of what happened. bullshit guys. i expected more from all of you. im quiet coz i dont want to sulk like you all. who knows me more that i do? i know that if i talk about it the whole day, nothing will change. she is still leaving! yes, im sad she is leaving, maybe as sad as you all are, or maybe more. but puhleaze, let me be. now im promising myself not to a sacrificial clown to you all coz it makes me puke nowadays. i dont blame you. i blame myself for letting you get to know me like that.
to you boss, i do feel sorry you have to go. career development, upset, all crappy reasons means nothing much to me. it all points out to the same result. you will leave us and we can't do anything about it.

damn.


watch one. learn one. teach one.